We know that you also encourage communication with your little one and you realize how important it is to the harmonious development of your child. But what do you do when the child asks you the most uncomfortable questions? Do you know how to manage them and, in particular, how to talk to the child, on the meaning of it?
There are sensitive topics that intimidate you. The child can ask difficult questions, and you, in the desire to protect their innocence, tend to distract their attention and hesitate to answer questions about death, sex, racism, drugs, divorce, etc. Avoiding answers is not, however, an approach in favor of the child! You may think that you are protecting him at the moment, but you will shoot more hair if he will look for answers elsewhere and the situation will not be managed to your liking. Also, your relationship may be suffering, the child will be puzzled and will need your help to explain certain concepts, which he or she cannot process alone.
Here are some difficult topics to address and some ideas for answers, in case your little one takes you by surprise with embarrassing questions:
1. How do you explain to your child that death is inevitable
The subject "death" is one that provokes the fear of your child, knows that death is something definitive and over which it has no power. When the child loses a loved one or his pet dies, it is the right time to talk to him about this topic. You can try to make an analogy: just as flowers blossom in the glaze, so do people age and die. Do not be surprised if after this discussion, his major fear will be to lose his parents or grandparents, because you are older than him.
Approaches the subject with a relaxed attitude, meant to assure the little one that he will not lose someone dear in the near future and that he has no reason to worry. He needs to feel safe and, above all, to know his loved ones safely. Even if you cannot guarantee that you will always be with them, you can ensure that you will do everything in your power to take care of yourself and your family and to try to prevent any situation that could put your life in danger. danger.
2. "Mommy, how are the children made and where do they come from?"
It is good to explain to children, even very small, in simple words, without too many details, that the love between mother and father makes the baby appear in the womb. Tell her that a baby is not brought by the stew, but the love between mommy and dad makes the baby appear in the womb, and 9 months after being in your womb he comes to the world with the help of doctors. If you have a scar from the caesarean section you can explain to them that sometimes it is necessary that the belly be cut in order to remove the baby.
When you are already 12-13 years old and the questions will be more about sex, do not hesitate to talk about pleasure, responsibility and contraceptive methods, it is better to have this information from you than to collect it from other sources. .
3. Discussion of drugs and alcohol
Children are tempted to experiment, especially in elementary school, so it is very important to know in which circles your child turns. You know very well that when you're a kid, "gang" sets the tone and sometimes, in the desire to get validation from others, children can make the wrong decisions and come in contact with smoking, drugs or alcohol.
The most important thing is that he understands that all of the above produce addiction, that once tried, the body will ask for them and it will be harder for them to give up than to try them at all. Explain to them that addicted people are no longer themselves and that their reactions and actions are often meant to respond to that addict who dictates their life. Draw attention to the dangers that can occur as a result of alcohol consumption (such as road accidents caused by people driving while drunk, or diseases caused by smoking).
As you grow older, the child will feel he can make decisions on his own, but until then make sure he can rely on you for an honest answer and especially that he has all the information to make the best decision.
4. What is homosexuality?
Homosexuality is no longer a taboo subject, although some still find it difficult to accept or discuss it. Teach him as a child to be tolerant and to respect the fact that we are not all the same, that we are unique on earth and that we do not all feel attraction for the opposite sex. Children perceive the world differently from us, they are more open to the idea that love can take many forms and will not be reluctant unless you as a parent already are.
5. Why are wars going on?
Another current topic, unfortunately, is related to violence and wars. It is hard to explain to a child that you are trying to teach them to be seafaring, altruistic and tolerant, that there are people in the world who willfully hurt other people. It is desirable that despite the fact that he is sometimes exposed to violence (listening to news on television, or having fun with a violent computer game) he knows that the best way to resolve a conflict is communication and empathy. Teach him about the repercussions of violence, about the fact that sometimes something terrible can happen even after an ordeal, and help him manage his anger when it happens.
Regardless of one's ethnicity, the child should be guided not to label people based on their looks and to understand that, although we are different, on the inside we are the same. You want to raise a child to become an open minded and tolerant adult, which is why it is important for him to learn to be tolerant as a child.
Teach him to be proud of his own ethnic heritage and, at the same time, respect the other, even if he is different from his own. In the course of his life he will meet all kinds of typologies, better people, worse, with a different skin tone than his own, with a culture or religion different from his, and yet with all having the same characteristic: we are people!
You will get hit by many uncomfortable topics over time, so arm yourself with patience, gather information and, before answering, think about what kind of attitude you want to instill in your child.
Tags Curiosity of children Mother's life